Monday, August 27, 2012

Leaps and Bounds

My baby's face is shrinking!!  I'm pretty sure not many people can say that with such enthusiasm.  We're something like five or six weeks without any seizures and three weeks off of the steroids.  Levi is back to his happy, dramatic little self and is making huge strides in his cognitive development.  He's suddenly communicating with us in ways that he should have been a few months back, but he's doing it all at once.  He's calling a few objects by name.  He's trying to get our attention.  He's using words and signs appropriately.  It's been very encouraging.  I don't remember if I've already mentioned this, but just before the seizures started, his doctor was a little concerned about his development.  There were several things that he wasn't doing that an eighteen month old should be able to do.  Being behind on one or two of those things can be completely normal, but he was behind in several.  His neurologist does attribute this to his seizures and said that all of this development happening so quickly after putting a stop to the seizures is a great sign that we've got the infantile spasms managed.

It's still been hard to deal with the concept of a child with epilepsy.  Life is pretty normal other than the morning and evening meds, but the idea of it has been difficult for me handle.  I've had so much support and encouragement from so many dear friends, though, and some days it has been those very thoughts and prayers that have helped me push through.  I had one comment, particularly, this past week that meant so much.  I've had so many texts and calls seeing how I'm doing, sending prayers, and sending youtube links about how good our God is.  But, for some reason, one little phrase from a friend put into words what I couldn't.

"That has to hurt your heart," she said.  It was a simple sentence - one little phrase.  It was the only thing that anybody has said to me, through all of this, that made me bawl my eyes out.  That was it.  The thing I couldn't put to words.  It wasn't some beautifully written card with eloquent words; it was one little, simple phrase, sent in a text.  And, for some reason , the tears that I cried when I read that phrase were like a salve to my hurting heart and I've been able to face each day with a new outlook.  Sure, my heart still hurts when I think about it.  But, in spite of everything, Levi is doing fine.  In fact, he's growing by leaps and bounds!  And, so am I.

Thank you, dear friend, for reaching out with the most simple, but heartfelt words.

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