Saturday, July 13, 2013

One Year and Some Venting

Today marks one year since we discovered Levi was having seizures so I figured I should write something.  I want to write an overview of the past year, but I think I'll do that in a couple of days.  I kind of need to vent some stress and writing here seems to help:
  Today has been a fairly good day, but an unusual one as far as schedule goes, so Levi's had the chance to be extra.... well.... Levi-y.  We've been outside for much of the day, which is nice, but we've been with friends, which is also nice except that outside and Levi and friends don't mesh well unless he's strapped down, which for obvious reasons doesn't work for long.  Levi wants to run free when we're outside and doesn't understand that staying close to Mom and Dad keeps him safe. I'm telling you, this kid has absolutely no comprehension of boundaries.  If you take your eyes off of him for thirty seconds, he's either in the neighbors yard on his way out of town or he's trying to play with the fire. So, if we're outside, and we're letting him play, we have to follow him everywhere.  This doesn't work well if we want to hang out with our friends.
  If we want to spend time with our friends outside, we have two options.  Our first option is to hold Levi while he CONSTANTLY tries to break free, which is very difficult with a two-and-a-half-year-old-sized-body.  Of course, this method is painful to the back and also includes a frustrated Levi crying in the ear of the parent because he just wants to get down and play.  This makes it very difficult for said parent to participate in any kind of conversation with another adult.  The second option, which is our usual choice, is that we take turns chasing and holding.  I'll chase while Daddy talks to friends and then Daddy will chase while I talk to friends.  Then we'll try to hold him with us so we can all talk. But, thirty to forty-five minutes of that gets to be exhausting and our endeavor to have quality time with friends just seems pointless.  It's really frustrating.  We're frequently asked, "What's wrong with Levi?"  "Is he tired?",  "Is he hungry?".  No.  This is Levi.  This is a little glimpse of what our life looks like. It is like this LITERALLY every time we spend time with people, especially outdoors.  There's not something wrong.  This is how he is.
Of course, the last thing I want is for anybody to feel bad for asking us questions like that.  There's no way anybody could know what it's like unless they lived it on a daily basis.  So, I'm not frustrated, or hurt, or upset in anyway with anyone.  I'm just tired, especially after today, and needed to vent a little.  Thanks for listening.


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